Last night and the first part of this whole day has been rocky for me. I was supposed to work today, but I let another sub have today because I knew I needed a break. The past two weeks I have worked longer hours and more than normal, even covering an extra route 3 of the days. Work wears on me, more so being just me and the girls. It's hard enough being by myself with the girls, I have good days, great days and just plain crappy days. I have actually been doing good for what seems a while, and now I'm letting everything get to me. I really wanted to work full time not taking any days off until my last day, because we NEED the money, I feel like I have all the weight on my shoulders right now. Weston's income and my income take care of the bills, and then me working extra is going towards a plane ticket, moving expenses, Disney, and our fun money for when Weston comes home. The only thing I am focusing on right now is the plane ticket, and I have been in a panic since yesterday. I know God will provide, I know everything will be okay, and yes I know... just trust God. It's just been one of those days. I needed today to get myself back together, to regain my focus, and it helped alot. At first I saw myself failing because I did not go to work, but I'm glad I did, I got alot done today. I feel MUCH better! And I'm looking forward to Ama turning 6 this week : ) This thursday is her birthday and she is one excited little girl. Everyday she is counting down the sleeps until her big day. And... this is awful... I know some parents think this is absolutely cute, but I don't, I think it's disgusting... Abi has started to suck her thumb... That's why I did pacifiers, you can take a pacifier away, not a thumb! She hasn't had a pacifier since last summer! I know what it is though... there's a kid at the baby sitter's that sucks their thumb and she has learned this horrible thing, at first I ignored her thinking it was a one time deal, but no... it is starting to become a fear of mine that this may be staying, and whether right or wrong I get on to her when I see her do it. But nothing so far has worked, she still sucks her thumb. Not even kidding if it gets worse, I'm putting hot sauce on her thumbs!! : )
I'm sitting outside typing on my blog while my kids are playing with the neighbors and one of the girl's is running around with a huge branch (like 3 of me tall, it's a thin branch) and as she's running she's hitting everyone's cars with this branch... and the parent is saying nothing... so I played the bad guy and made her put it down, she lays it down in the middle of the road... already feeling like I overstepped boundaries with the dad right there I didn't say anything else, and then a car pulled in and had to get out of her car to move the branch to get to her house... random I know, just thought I would share : ) Now I'm fixing to play bad guy with my kids and make them come inside, because I'm freezing, and I have lots to do still tonight!!